Time for a bit of rant. Folks have been sending me hyperlinks to espresso information tales for so long as I can bear in mind. They know me because the writer of INeedCoffee, and so they consider they’ve stumbled upon some espresso information merchandise that has escaped my radar. More often than not, I’m not solely conscious of the information merchandise, however it’s one thing I may care much less about.
For this text, I’ve determined to record the 5 espresso information tales that I’ll NEVER examine once more. Right here they’re.
#1 Espresso Well being Cheerleading Tales
I plan on doing a full article on this subject, however I’ll preserve it transient for now. I drink espresso as a result of I just like the style. It typically makes me really feel nice, and I benefit from the social facet. If there are optimistic well being advantages, that doesn’t impression my conduct. I’ll nonetheless drink espresso.
All of us have distinctive responses to espresso and caffeine. These responses differ wildly from individual to individual. These responses change over time. We’re all distinctive. Sharing hyperlinks to some examine {that a} majority of people in some group achieved a minor well being profit from consuming espresso is meaningless to a gaggle ALREADY consuming espresso.
Please don’t ship me any tales that glamorize the well being advantages of espresso. I received’t learn them as a result of they do nothing to enhance my well being. Keep in mind, we’re already ingesting espresso. The one individuals who would possibly profit from these tales are individuals who love and might tolerate espresso however have stopped ingesting it for concern it’s damaging their well being. That isn’t us, although.
#2 Animals Pooping Espresso
Cease sending me hyperlinks to tales concerning the newest animal that they’ve tricked into consuming and pooping out espresso. Civet cats or birds or elephants or monkeys. I don’t care. It’s previous information. It might have been humorous 10 years in the past, however now there are a number of reviews of animal cruelty associated to civet cats and this technique of espresso manufacturing.
#3 Something Starbucks is Up To
On the time of this writing, the Starbucks Company is value $40 Billion (USD). Regardless that they’re massively rich, they’ve discovered the way to get hundreds of thousands of {dollars} in free advertising and marketing. Each month or so, they ship out a press launch about one thing they’re as much as, and lazy reporters in all places rearrange the phrases and publish it as “information”. In the meantime, small unbiased espresso companies with no advertising and marketing budgets doing much more progressive stuff with espresso can barely get a point out of their neighborhood weblog.
A number of individuals have despatched me the newest Starbucks “information” story about some $7 cup of espresso. Boring. In 2008, unbiased espresso outlets charged between $9 and $15 for a cup of Panama Esmeralda. Yeah, that’s the place unbiased espresso was 4 years in the past. They sought the best high quality micro-lots and paid high greenback for these beans. Just for them, it wasn’t a advertising and marketing gimmick. Their mission was to push the envelope by way of espresso high quality, which they proceed to do.
My first Clover Espresso was at Seattle’s Trabant Espresso in Might 2007. This was a full yr earlier than Starbucks bought the corporate and even longer earlier than they started deploying them into shops.
Please don’t ship me any information objects associated to Starbucks*. Once I look again at my espresso training, I contemplate them to be center college at greatest. INeedCoffee exists to empower espresso drinkers to make higher espresso at residence. Tutorials on this web site will train you the way to brew and roast espresso, which is superior to something Starbucks can do.
* This additionally extends to Tully’s, Dunkin Donuts, Mcdonald’s, or some other publicly traded company that sells espresso.
#4 Automated Single Espresso Brewers
When did espresso change into so tough to make that we wanted to fill our counters and break rooms with stale pod-based espresso brewers? Is making espresso actually that onerous or messy? Might I by no means obtain one other electronic mail that mentions Keurig, Senseo, or regardless of the newest mediocre pod-based espresso maker occurs to be. These machines are the enemy of excellent espresso. They promote the idea that making espresso is tough and messy. It isn’t.
#5 Any Espresso Information Merchandise Featured on the Homepage of Main Information Shops
We reside in a hyper-connected world. By the point a espresso information merchandise hits the entrance web page of main information shops, there’s greater than an honest probability I’ve seen it or will quickly. Not too long ago, NPR did a espresso story. About seven individuals despatched me hyperlinks to the story inside a number of days. I believe it was about some animal pooping out espresso (see #2). Earlier than you share any information merchandise with anybody, give them a bit of credit score and assume they aren’t dwelling below a rock. The very best information objects will at all times be those which are manner below the radar. A contemporary angle on espresso that hasn’t been reprinted in all places will at all times be extra attention-grabbing than headline espresso information.
OK. Rant over. I really feel higher now.
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